Do you think sharing secrets is good for a friendship, or do they tear friendships apart?

3 Answers

Lily Bradic Profile
Lily Bradic answered

Really, this depends on what sort of friendship you're talking about, and whose secrets you're sharing!

Sharing Secrets: When to Share and Who to Share With

  • If you're close friends with someone, you probably trust them not to tell everybody else your secrets. If they've got previous - or have shared other people's secrets with you - then you might want to think carefully before spilling your own!
  • I don't see how sharing secrets with a close friend could ruin the friendship in any way. The only way that might happen is if the friend then tells someone else, or is likely to share it with everyone if you two have an argument or stop being friends.
  • If your secret is one that's likely to upset your friend, then it's probably best to keep it to yourself. For example, "I got drunk and slept with your ex-boyfriend" might not get a very positive response, but honesty is just as important in a friendship as trust is, so on the other hand, it might be good - in the long run, at least - to share a secret like that.
  • Don't share your secrets with casual acquaintances or sort-of friends. This is often how gossip starts, and can quickly get out of control!
Ultimately, if you're worried about sharing a secret, or you're not entirely sure that it's a good idea, don't do it. If you change your mind at a later date, by all means, share it - but if your instincts are telling you not to, then listen!

Arthur Wright Profile
Arthur Wright answered
Much of this all depends on who you tell. Can they really keep a secret a secret, or do they love to talk? Everyone and all relationships and friendships have certain secrets within them, but what happens to those secrets is what makes a friendship a good or bad one.
Michaela beney Profile
Michaela beney answered

Well if it's your secret and no one else's secret and if you're very close friends and you can trust them not to tell anyone else then I think it's good to share secrets, it also takes a huge weight off your shoulders.  If your mate is a true friend then they shouldn't treat you any different.

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Dan Banks
Dan Banks commented
Yeah I think I agree with you on this one. What other things do you think are important in friendships?
Michaela beney
Michaela beney commented
i think communication and trust are the most important but it's also important to be understanding, supportive and to have quite a lot of things in common.

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